Hello out there in the blogosphere! I know who some of you are, but I wish I knew who all of you were. I guess it doesn't really matter, but my inquiring mind just wants to know. I usually imagine that my readers are middle aged, church going women with a sense of humor cuz hey, that's who I am. But once in a while someone who is not at all in that demographic will mention they read my posts. That always surprises me. So then, I start to over think things and wonder if they get bored since I don't write about guy stuff or young twenty something stuff or senior citizen topics. But then again, I figure some things are applicable across the entire span of age, gender, religion, and interests. Besides, if I get too girly girl, too churchy, too middle aged mom, or too silly for someone's taste, they can always stop reading. But I'm truly honored and thankful that anyone would take the time to read the ramblings and rabbit trails that wind through my mind.
I gave you the outline for this post in the title. So let's start with the good. I got accepted into grad school! Woo hoo! And I am able to borrow enough money to actually take classes. I'd rather not borrow, but I don't have that kind of money sitting around. School is EXPENSIVE! I'm only taking two classes my first semester because I haven't been to school for 32 years, and I also have responsibilities at home, church, Community Bible Study kids' class, as well as homeschooling my 12 year old. Since I'm not sure how rigorous the program is or how long it will take me to do each assignment, I thought it would be better to start out slowly. The online classes are done in 8 week segments, so although I will have two classes, they won't be in the same eight weeks. My first class will be Introduction to Marriage and Family Counseling. It starts in 20 days. I'm thinking it won't be too hard since it's an intro class. One of the classes I will have to take at some point is statistics. Yeah, not really looking forward to that. I decided it might not be the best idea to tackle that one my first semester. Anyway, so now I am officially a college student again at age 53. When all my classes are completed and I've passed the comprehensive exam, I will have my MA in Marriage and Family Therapy. Then you can tell me all your problems and give me money. ;-) Just Kidding. You aren't supposed to do counseling for friends or family.
Found out from the nice psychologist lady that I have ADHD. Suprise! Not. Anyway, I always said I have ADD, no H cuz I'm about as far from being physically hyper as you can get. But apparently, whether or not you have hyperactivity, it's now called ADHD. I did not know this. Did you? See, you learned something by reading here. There are three subtypes of ADHD. Type one is primarily inattentive (that's me). Type 2 is primarily hyperactive/impulsive (not me). Type 3 is combined (the whole enchilada). I will be starting on 10 mg a day of generic Adderall. We'll see how that goes and adjust as needed.
The bad is that a combo of bad days, extra appointments, financial stress, trying to figure out the details of two of my daughters' birthdays that happen within a week got me off track a bit. And then ... on Sunday I woke up with a stiff neck ( not usually a big deal cuz it happens every once in a while). I figured it would feel better by the end of the day since that's always been what happens. But nope. It kept hurting. It was really bad by the time I went to bed. I didn't sleep at all well that night, and went to the doctor first thing in the morning. He didn't feel the need to do any tests, just asked questions and examined me, then told me it was a muscle spasm and gave me Toradol and a muscle relaxant. I took two doses of those, and they didn't do Jack diddly squat! So I ended up going to urgent care that night, and that doctor very hesitatingly gave me Norco. OK I know you have to be careful with opioids, but sometimes narcotics are the only thing that will touch the pain. And it did help A LOT, but I only had 8 pills, so I was all out by the end of the third day. And now, even with Tylenol, Toradol, and muscle relaxants, I had very fitful bits of sleep interrupted by pain going from my neck down into my shoulder. I have a chiropractor appointment on Monday because I don't think there's much the regular doctor can do for me. I highly doubt they will give any more narcotics, and their other pain meds aren't doing much. I'm guessing the nerve is being compressed by something since the pain radiates down my arm, and I have a weakened grip in that hand. Makes putting on my bra seem like an Olympic event. Oh the joys of aging! Thinking maybe it could be a problem with a disk or arthritis. I'm hoping that by doing an adjustment on my vertebrae the chiropractor can give me some relief.
Anyway, the combo of pain, lack of sleep, and being a little loopy when I was taking Norco means all my routines and progress in my house basically went to you know where in a handbasket. So here I sit, back at square one. But the good news is I'm at the point where I'm ready to ease back into things. Yes, I'm still in pain. Yes, it takes me longer to get dressed or do anything that requires a good left hand grip, but I figure it's always better to do something than nothing. So I started working on the kitchen a little bit at a time a couple of days ago. It's still not done, but it's a lot better now than it was Thursday morning. Today I grocery shopped for the week, so I can get back to lower carb eating. Then I came home and made a to do list. Honestly, I really didn't feel like doing any of it. I'm uncomfortable and exhausted, but I know I feel better emotionally when I'm working toward something and making even tiny bits of progress. I realized that I hadn't been writing a to do list for a couple of weeks, and that if I want to get back on track and make better use of my time, that's where I need to start.
So today, I hope to encourage you by sharing my challenges and how I'm working through them. I have a feeling I'm not the only one out there who gets off track ever. So if you have too, don't beat yourself up. Don't let the thoughts overwhelm you like I did. It's funny how listing those tasks on paper makes them seem more doable. And I need things to be changed from the swirling twirling overwhelming chaos that zips around in my head. The list takes that and turns it into concrete, specific actions that I can handle one at a time, so that progress can happen even when life ends up being a pain in the neck.
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